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Post by YankeeFan on Aug 28, 2019 13:51:21 GMT
Woman identifies as lesbian, but her partner transitions to male, and now she's struggling with the idea of people viewing her as one half of a cis couple. When Kate Murray and Andy Arnold first started dating in their early twenties, they were part of a tightknit group of lesbian friends in the District. The couple and their friends hung out almost every weekend, organizing potluck dinners and frequenting ladies’ nights at local gay bars.
Then, about two years ago, Andy came out as a transgender man. And as he transitioned, with Kate’s support, the couple suddenly felt they no longer belonged in the “women-centric” spaces they were used to. They tried testing out a new group of friends — a “blank slate,” a group in which Andy wouldn’t have to talk about his trans identity, he said. He could just “blend in” as a man.
To the new friends, they were just Andy and Kate — a man dating a woman. And that was just how Andy liked it. But to Kate, “it felt like a lie,” she said. She wanted to express her queer identity, she said, but how could she do that without making Andy uncomfortable?
www.washingtonpost.com/local/social-issues/to-some-this-queer-couple-looks-straight-for-him-thats-okay-but-for-her-it-feels-like-a-lie/2019/08/22/098b83f2-c43b-11e9-b5e4-54aa56d5b7ce_story.html |
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Post by xanadu on Aug 28, 2019 13:52:03 GMT
Woman identifies as lesbian, but her partner transitions to male, and now she's struggling with the idea of people viewing her as one half of a cis couple.
When Kate Murray and Andy Arnold first started dating in their early twenties, they were part of a tightknit group of lesbian friends in the District. The couple and their friends hung out almost every weekend, organizing potluck dinners and frequenting ladies’ nights at local gay bars.
Then, about two years ago, Andy came out as a transgender man. And as he transitioned, with Kate’s support, the couple suddenly felt they no longer belonged in the “women-centric” spaces they were used to. They tried testing out a new group of friends — a “blank slate,” a group in which Andy wouldn’t have to talk about his trans identity, he said. He could just “blend in” as a man.
To the new friends, they were just Andy and Kate — a man dating a woman. And that was just how Andy liked it. But to Kate, “it felt like a lie,” she said. She wanted to express her queer identity, she said, but how could she do that without making Andy uncomfortable?
www.washingtonpost.com/local/social-issues/to-some-this-queer-couple-looks-straight-for-him-thats-okay-but-for-her-it-feels-like-a-lie/2019/08/22/098b83f2-c43b-11e9-b5e4-54aa56d5b7ce_story.html lol |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 28, 2019 13:56:14 GMT
“You went out with a white male?” “I was only a freshman!” “Freshperson, please!”  |
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Post by YankeeFan on Aug 28, 2019 13:59:20 GMT
Straight, white chicks, who identify as bi, so they can feel like they're down for the struggle are my favorite. Julianne Hough is not alone. About 4 in 10 LGBT adults in the United States identify as bisexual. And among bisexual people with partners, almost 9 in 10 are married or in a relationship with someone of the opposite sex, according to a Pew Research Center analysis in June of survey data from Stanford University.
For Deidre Pilcher, a mother of three in Frederick, Md., being married to a man has provided a sort of safety net in her conservative Mormon extended family. (Her husband is a cisgender man.)
“I don’t have to be ostracized by my community, and sometimes I feel a little guilty about that, that I can sort of hide,” Pilcher, 40, said. “I don’t have to pay a social price. My kids don’t have to pay a price.”
But “passing” has been a double-edged sword for Pilcher in recent years, as she’s become more comfortable being open about her sexual identity. Whether at a Pride parade or at classes for her graduate program in marriage and family therapy, she gets frustrated when people assume she is straight. It’s become increasingly important for her to be open about her true self around her friends.
“It’s kind of constant mental gymnastics. I definitely acknowledge my privilege and I try to speak out and support the LGBT community wherever I can, but it seems like it would be helpful if I felt like they let me in,” Pilcher said. “We love people to just cleanly fit into groups. . . . But people just aren’t that simple.”www.washingtonpost.com/local/social-issues/to-some-this-queer-couple-looks-straight-for-him-thats-okay-but-for-her-it-feels-like-a-lie/2019/08/22/098b83f2-c43b-11e9-b5e4-54aa56d5b7ce_story.html |
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Post by Vombatus on Aug 28, 2019 15:48:08 GMT
Bi women are hawt.
Increased chance of trois-way.
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Post by batman on Aug 28, 2019 18:00:14 GMT
Wasn't this an episode of Three's Company?
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Post by YankeeFan on Aug 28, 2019 18:13:37 GMT
Wasn't this an episode of Three's Company? LOL. I very nearly referred to this as the plot of a lost episode of Three’s Company. |
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Post by Wolfenstein on Aug 28, 2019 18:18:01 GMT
Jack Tripper never acknowledged his privilege, though. Well, unless you count that admission to Mr. Furley when he was moving out.
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Post by batman on Aug 28, 2019 23:36:27 GMT
Jack Tripper never acknowledged his privilege, though. Well, unless you count that admission to Mr. Furley when he was moving out. And he was faking being gay all those years. Talk about cultural appropriation! |
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Post by xanadu on Aug 28, 2019 23:40:08 GMT
If anyone was gay it was Mr. Fucking Furley with that fashion statement around his neck. Those wacky '70s.  |
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Post by doctorquant on Aug 29, 2019 1:51:24 GMT
My “girlfriend” in high school (she would consent to occasional dates with yours truly) ... her father was Don Knotts’ college roomate. #brushwithfame
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Post by Deleted on Aug 29, 2019 20:40:00 GMT
My “girlfriend” in high school (she would consent to occasional dates with yours truly) ... her father was Don Knotts’ college roomate. # brushwithfameWow, three degrees of Don Knotts. |
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Post by xanadu on Aug 29, 2019 20:46:33 GMT
I always thought Steve Buscemi was Don Knotts' son.
It's that look.
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